The 17 Laws Podcast

Your Marriage & Your Health

In this episode, Russ covers the topic of Physical Health and how it correlates with the Health of your marriage.

The 17 Laws Podcast | Your Marriage & Your Health How can physical health affect a marriage? In this episode of The 17 Laws, we discuss how your physical health can influence your marriage and what you can do to maintain a healthy relationship.

Follow us on Social Media:
https://www.facebook.com/the17laws
https://www.tiktok.com/@the17laws

How To Save for College & Cars

In this episode of The 17 Laws, we're talking about how to save for college and vehicles for your children. We'll discuss the best ways to start saving, how much you should be saving, and where to put that money. We'll also talk about how to teach your children the importance of savings so they can start making wise financial decisions early on. Listen to the podcast!

Follow us on Social Media:
https://www.facebook.com/the17laws
https://www.tiktok.com/@the17laws

How to Get Your Marriage Out of a Rut

This will be a shorter show than normal, but is super important. If your marriage is in a rut or headed that way, you’ll enjoy this today. I am willing to do whatever it takes to avoid a rut in our marriage. My wife and I have committed to keeping the romance in our marriage alive and in turn, keeping our marriage alive. Today, I’m not going to talk about just the romance side and I’m not directly talking about if your sex life is in a rut. However, if your sex life is in a rut in your marriage, then all this other stuff is certainly a factor. For those of you who want to talk about your sex life and intimacy, well you are in luck. I am working on a series to address this area from all angles. As I’m putting this series together, I’m not holding back on what I’m going to talk about, so stay tuned for that coming around late Spring of 2021. I do have a chapter in my book, the 17 Laws of Marriage, dedicated to intimacy that will help your sex life in a big way. But the series coming will be much more in depth. I’m not going to leave any topic left for your imagination. Back to this show. Our kids have been growing up, getting married, moving out, and moving away. Brainstorming what Tracy and I could do for fun together; I came up with what I considered a scathingly brilliant idea. What I DIDN’T want to do is to grow into a habit of coming home, watching TV, and going to bed. We’ve never been a family of TV watchers, but I didn’t want to get into a rut with our marriage, so I was trying to be proactive. My idea was to buy a tandem bike. When I presented this idea to Tracy, she thought I was kidding and responded with a chuckle as you probably did. I reminded her how much fun we had when we rented tandem bikes on vacation at the beach. She figured out I was serious and seemed at least open to the idea so off we went to a local bicycle shop. What Tracy didn’t know is that I had actually given it a TON of thought and had gone overboard on research to find the perfect bike. Consistent with how my research usually pans out, absolutely none of it came in handy, but we still left the bike store as proud owners of a new tandem bike. My goal was to find something fun, something we could do together, and something that wasn’t typical. This has worked out well because I am happy to report that we have enjoyed quite a few miles on our new bike. If it’s nice outside, the idea of riding the bike comes into the conversation. We quickly learned that teamwork is required - the rider in the back exercises their trust for the driver in the front. Both riders have to pedal, but if one tires, it’s possible to pull more than your own weight for a while if you need to. I can assure you that if you are on a tandem bike, you are not in a rut. When we go out to eat, we are always chatting with each other. I hate it when I look around the restaurant and I see so many couples who are just sitting in silence or staring at phones. I want to go over there and say, HEY PUT DOWN YOUR PHONES……ENJOY each other! Sometimes when we are at a restaurant we’ll say, we can’t leave the restaurant until we see someone who looks like someone else. For example, hey, he looks like George Clooney, or hey, she looks like Belle from Beauty and the Beast. All this just to have fun.

Is this issue with your spouse a hill you are willing to die on?

Me: “Where do you want to eat dinner?”

Tracy: “I don’t care. Where do you want to go?”

Me: “How about Chick Fil A.”

Tracy: “Oh, I’m tired of Chick Fil A

Me: “Okay, how about Longhorn.”

Tracy: “That place smells funny. But I don’t really care where we go.”

Me: “How about that new Italian place on the river or where would you like to eat dinner?”

Tracy: “I really don’t care. You pick.”

How many of those conversations have you had? It’s almost a humorous Abbott-and-Costello routine in our family. I’ll start naming every restaurant my wife hates until we finally agree on something. We are typically laughing about it now, but 20 years ago, it would get heated - we’d be arguing about something as trivial as a dinner location!

A wise man once said, “You should ask your spouse, ‘Guess where we are going to dinner?’ and whatever place they guess, go there.”

Here’s the truth on this game: I really don’t care where we eat dinner. Seriously, as long as I’m with Tracy, I DON'T CARE!

Where we eat dinner is not a hill I’m willing to die on.

I’m not letting my children go to a keg party, so that is a hill I’m willing to die on.

I don’t want to go in debt up to our eyeballs, so that is a hill I’m willing to die on.

A while back, I found myself in hotel room at midnight. A man I knew had walked out on his wife, checked into a room, and called me asking what to do next. He was furious. She was livid. It was obvious things had gotten completely out of hand - he was sitting in a hotel room just down the road from a perfectly good house where his wife and child were. This spitting match grew out of what should have been a small issue, but it consumed them both. As the night wore on, I sat there listening to him at the Holiday Inn Express as he enthusiastically tried to convince me, “Don’t you see, I’m the one who is right! She’s crazy!” I can honestly say that most of the time a marriage is in trouble they get in front of me, both spouses are blaming each other.

 

Practical Ways to Show Love Languages #19

Today, I want to talk practical. I want to talk about how to put all these love languages in action today. I want you to watch this and in a few minutes from now be able to do some things that will drastically change your marriage.

To keep this relatively brief, I’m only going to talk about the top four love languages that I see most of the time.

You may not know what a love language is and you may not know that you should care. You may know what they are and are tired of hearing about them.

I’m not trying to make this sound better than it really is, but I promise you that nearly 100% of the time  I’m chatting with couples, the topic of love languages come up.

Just last week a guy came in my office and said, “Wow, it’s been a rough couple of days at my house. No matter what I say, it’s turning into a tense situation.  Keep in mine they have small kids in the house.  I said, hey, you told me you played golf with your buddies the other day on your day off. I’m curious.  When was the last time you had a date night? When was the last time you spend any length of time with her?

You could see his face sink as he just realized that he really had any quality time with his wife In probably a month.  She’s home with kids all day every day and for a month he’s not initiated some time with her.  Some REAL time. REAL quality time.

He immediately called his wife and scheduled a date night. About a week later I asked him how it was going and he said GREAT! With a huge smile on his face.

Here’s what’s funny. For the past couple of years, I’ve had the exact same conversation with him. 

Here’s what people do in many aspects of life.  They don’t worry about anything until it’s an issue.  Fortunately for him, the issue didn’t get too out of hand.

Much of the time our job, our health or whatever, we don’t really focus on it until it gets sideways.

In love languages, time after time, I’ll chat with folks about it, give them practical ways to implement, they will for a while, life gets good, then they stop, then life goes to hell in a handbasket, they come back to me and we start the process all over again.

About Russ Rogers:

Russ has been married to his high school sweetheart for 31 years, Tracy. They have four children of whom three are through college and working in their careers and another in high school.

Russ is the author of The 17 Laws of Marriage, The 17 Laws of Parenting-Revised, The 17 Laws of Parenting, and Co-authored Pillars of Success with Pat Summit and Alexander Haig, Jr. 

Russ is also currently the managing partner of a company that has 80 employees.

Russ has held positions as CFO, COO, Managing Partner, among others.

Russ enjoys time with his family that could include hiking, biking, traveling, four wheeling, and hanging out watching movies while enjoying Cheezits and Peanut Butter M&M’s.

How to put FUN & excitement back in your marriage

Russ Rogers here, from the 17 Laws Studio and today we are going to talk about how to put the FUN and Excitement back in your marriage.

Whether you are recently married, have kids, don’t have children, whether you are 25 or 55, I can help you.

It doesn’t matter if you have small kids in the house or if you are empty nesters. I’m going to help you.

It is so easy to get into a ratrace or you were just barely existing throughout the week. You try to get through each day and before you know it six months has passed. Well today we are going to put the train back on the tracks.

I can tell you without any reservation whatsoever that my wife and I have more fun now than ever. We have more dates and more fun in our life than we did when we first got married. There’s not a week that goes by that we don’t have at least one date night.

We’ve had to learn some things the hard way but for the last many, MANY years, romance and excitement has been a constant in our lives.

AND TODAY, we are going to talk about how to get back to dating again.

Q&A Money in Marriage and Parenting

Russ Rogers here, from the 17 Laws Studio and today we are going to talk about YOUR money in YOUR marriage.

How YOUR money affects your children.

How YOUR money affects your marriage.

Here are there questions that I’ve been asked dozens of times, and today I want to answer all three of them for you.

#1 Should I work extra jobs to get ahead financially? If I do, I won’t be able to spend as much time with my family.

#2 Should my wife work or stay home with the kids? We can’t afford for her to stay home.

#3 Should my teenager get a job? As always, I’ll surprise you with my answers!

Single Parenting with Author Holly Buchanan Part 2

Single Parenting is the hardest job in the world!

Author and speaker, Holly Buchanan is here today to work single parents through a process of keeping sane and being a good parent.

This is part two where Part 1 dealt with keeping the single parent healthy mentally, emotionally and physically. In Part 2, we are going to discuss who to deal with the hard things as a single parent.

Making children mind, children dating and even the single parent dating.

Holly Buchanan has spent the past 15 years as a single parent journeying through the many stages of raising her daughter, Lindsey, now 23.  Holly was brought up in a loving family in Missouri and Tennessee.  She earned her Bachelor of Arts Degree in Human Development from Vanderbilt University in Nashville.  Although never expecting at the time to be in the position of rating her daughter of 5 alone, her journey has been rich with ups and downs.  She also had to leave an abusive relationship which meant she had to learn to raise her daughter without any help from your ex-husband. These all provided countless lessons along the way.  With a passion to share all she has gained with other single parents facing similar challenges, Holly hopes to make their journey easier and more fulfilling by giving them specific ways to empower themselves and their kids.  She currently lives in Nashville, Tennessee, and has just completed her second book on single parenting.

Single Parenting with Author Holly Buchanan Part 1

This is all about the parent. How to be a single parent. How to take care of yourself as a single parent. It's like the oxygen mask on a plane; they tell you to put on your mask before you can help others.

Part 1 is about helping YOU, the single parent. How to remain sane.

Holly Buchanan has spent the past 15 years as a single parent journeying through the many stages of raising her daughter, Lindsey, now 23.  Holly was brought up in a loving family in Missouri and Tennessee.  She earned her Bachelor of Arts Degree in Human Development from Vanderbilt University in Nashville.  Although never expecting at the time to be in the position of rating her daughter of 5 alone, her journey has been rich with ups and downs.  She also had to leave an abusive relationship which meant she had to learn to raise her daughter without any help from your ex-husband.

These all provided countless lessons along the way. 

With a passion to share all she has gained with other single parents facing similar challenges, Holly hopes to make their journey easier and more fulfilling by giving them specific ways to empower themselves and their kids. 

She currently lives in Nashville, Tennessee, and has just completed her second book on single parenting.

Disciplining your Children Part 3

Russ Rogers here, from the 17 Laws Studio and we are in part three of disciplining your children.

Having trouble getting your children to go to bed on time? Today I’ll help you.

Can’t decide which punishment to use on your child? Today, I’ll help you.

We don’t want to hit a gnat with a sledge hammer but we don’t want a kiss on a cheek for punching your sister.

Want some peace back in your house?

Are you tired of being tired and now you are ready to get back in control?

You have chosen a great show to watch because today I’ll quickly recap Part 1 and 2 so you’ll know that if you missed them, you’ll want to go back so all this will make so much more sense. Also, I am going to show you how to get your children to go to bed on time. How to get them to do anything WITHOUT the attitude.

We are going to talk about punishment. I know often times the husband and wife disagree, or one is at work and the other is in the middle of the chaos having to deal with hit, well, I’m going to address ALL that today. Perhaps most importantly, I don’t want to have to deal with chaos. I merely don’t want the chaos in my house so that I don’t have to deal with it. Today, I’m going to talk about how to keep the chaos OUT of your house so that you don’t have to deal with it in the first place.